Past, present, future

Just really tired again today. The kids couldn't sleep because Papa was at a meeting and the weather is a little too warm. It made the day longer. A day that wasn't bad but was filled with thoughts and concerns about the future.

The future...there is so much to be concerned about. Tommy reminded me that my focus should be on what is going on today. What is happening right now, in light of eternity...not worried about what will happen next week, next year or whatever point in time I happen to be fixated on. (I never have to wonder why God included Matthew 6:25-34 in the Bible, I just need to be reminded to trust the promises of it)

Of course the future was not the only thing distracting me today. The past was too. I cut my 9 year old's hair today. That may not seem significant but over the past 18 months we have allowed him to keep it long. He liked it that way and it was something we could allow him to enjoy. It is getting warmer though and for hygiene purposes we cut it. I was instantly brought back to my sweet little 4 year old blond boy. Life was a lot simpler with him when he was 4. I miss that simplicity. Now God often uses this child to remind me that He is the Author of Salvation and the One who gives Grace...I cannot make my children to believe. I don't know change their heart. I can only be faithful to what God has called me to do: tell them the Gospel, again and again and again...

It is difficult to be content with faithfulness. I want perfection. Regrets of the past, worries about the future...it is enough to make us forget what God has done, is doing and will do...

Ephesians 2  And you were dead in the trespasses and sins ²  in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— ³ among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body^[a] and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.^{[b] 4} But^[c] God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, ⁵ even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ— by grace you have been saved— ⁶ and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, ⁷ so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. ⁸ For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, ⁹  not a result of works, so that no one may boast. ¹⁰ For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.