Ugh

I have a huge problem with fear. It is huge. Tommy and I made a critical decision based on conviction for our family and today was the first opportunity to enforce that decision and I was so upset about what others might think that I was sick to my stomach all afternoon. I mean, doubled over, clutching my stomach in pain, fearing and worrying about the outcome of this decision. I know that is not right. I know that is a lack of faith in God and I know that the Gospel is the answer but still I struggle, a lot. There is a disconnect in knowing what the answer is and seeing, trusting, embracing, confessing...KNOWING Jesus as the answer. I want to have faith and be free of this bondage...because that is what fear is, bondage. This is my new pursuit and I am sure I will write again as God moves and strengthens me and opens my eyes to see the truth.