Impatience is my name and disorder is my game. Well, that is how I feel when I consider all the things that I can and would like to share with you about what God is doing through this commitment. It is difficult for me to recognize that I am going to be doing this for 365 days and so I do not have to expel every thought and idea and concern that goes through my head to you in this blog. That would be annoying and extremely confusing neither of which glorify God. So, I need to remember I can take this one day, one subject at a time. There will be another day to talk about that other subject, Lord willing.
When I sit down to worship God on my own I am often overwhelmed with everything that I have to do during the rest of the day. Today for example, I had to force myself to stop in the middle of a project, knowing that it and the next project (dishes) would not be finished until late in the afternoon, in order to take advantage of the quiet due to fewer children. My window of opportunity was slim but I reminded myself that the most important thing needs to be MOST IMPORTANT. Sitting down I pulled out my Bible, journal, and a small pad of paper and a pen. The pad of paper was for those tasks that I would suddenly remember as I began to read the first few words of Joshua 19. I start with writing "Pick up living room, do dishes" then I set the paper aside to wait for the next task to threaten to steal my allegiance. This is critical for me. It is my way of saying, "you are not my master!" If I don't write them down though I will fret the rest of my time over whether or not I will remember to add conditioner to my grocery list. Who can worship God when they are fretting about conditioner? I know it sounds silly but the simplest things will lure me from the precious Words of God that reveal Himself to me.
What distracts you from personal worship of God? Do you already know? How have you solved past problems of distraction? If you don't know why personal worship is difficult ask God to show you what distracts you. It is a difficult question to ask. Difficult because He will answer it and you may not want to know that answer.
I find that one of my biggest distractions is my physical comfort. If I don't feel "well" enough, it is a great excuse to stay in bed and sleep up the time that I know God is calling me to be with Him! I have really had to fight that one, but He has been so gracious and merciful in response to my obedience. I am so humbled to know that He wants a relationship with sinful, selfish, proud, pitiful me!! Praie Him for His abundant love! Amen!!
ReplyDeleteHelen, I am so enjoying reading your writing! I love the sincerity and honesty, it reminds me that even those who in my mind have it all together (ahem, you) have so much in common with me and how I feel.
ReplyDeleteWhat distracts me? My own brokenness. I am so completely aware of my need for a Savior that sometimes it is hard to accept the grace and love that He alone offers.
I Know the feeling. and the rewards are well worth it. Keep on keeping on, honey!
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